I know that seems like a rather harsh way to start off a blog post… BUT.. It’s the absolute truth. Infertility is emotionally draining. It tests your hope and faith in God. And for a lot of women, it is even physically painful. So yeah… like I originally said, it sucks!
But as horrible as infertility is, I have a lot of “what if” questions concerning it. Now, these aren’t your typical “what if” questions dealing with infertility like: “What if I didn’t have that abortion” or “what if we would have started trying sooner”… No… my questions are a bit different. They are more along the lines of….
WHAT IF… we look at this “infertility” thing totally different?
WHAT IF… we changed our perspective about our Journey to Motherhood?
WHAT IF… we saw this thing the way God sees it?
Then how differently our faith, hope, emotions and our very lives would be.
One of the most important things that I’ve learned about this journey is that it’s all about….
According to Google perspecive is described as
a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.
It just depends on how we CHOOSE to look at things. We can choose to be in our feelings all the time and view this thing from a human, fleshly perspective. Or we can choose to see things from God’s point of view. It really does come down to simply being a choice. But just make a note that if we choose the fleshly perspective we’ll miss the beauty and blessings that are in the midst of the pain and turmoil.
The thing about the fleshly point of view is that it’s only one dimensional. All we’re able to see is the pain, suffering, tears and turmoil. But God’s perspective is multi-dimensional and multi-faceted. It’s only within God’s perspective that we’ll really understand that this journey is not only happening to us but it’s also happening for us (see Romans 8:28). There is a divine purpose for us going through this journey even if we don't see it right now. Remember, there is NOTHING that we go through that God doesn’t know about and hasn’t already pre-approved (read Job 1).
As horrible as this journey may be, God has given us blessings in the midst of it all. Think about your newfound, authentic relationship with Christ; the deep intimacy you’ve experience with your husband; the revelation of your purpose and your platform; or your compassion and empathy for other women (regardless of religious and cultural backgrounds)… These, my dear friends, are blessings that God has given us in the midst of all the hurt and pain. These things (and so many more) are our “beauty for ashes”. So the next time you find yourself talking about your infertility journey, don’t forget to mention the beauty and blessings.
It’s OK to feel sad and long for your unconceived child. It’s OK to mourn the loss of your unborn child. It’s even OK to ask God why certain things are happening in your body. All of this comes with the territory and you being human. Just don't forget to tell the world how good God has been and what He’s doing for you in the middle of your journey!